Fuck Yeah! Tanuki!

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I AM TANUKI MISTRESS.

The blog was originally made for translating the sex threads of visualtanuki for the lolz. I've branched out a little. However, I'm still not here for bangya-related wank. Please direct any comments about fans/bangya to fuckyeahbangya.

Pretty much all of the info about specific band guys on this blog is a rumor. That means that it is up to you to decide whether or not you believe it is true.

Not to be answering any questions phrased as "Is there anything on ______?" Find a specific question to ask or I will delete your request immediately. I will sometimes answer specific requests for information from tanuki and I will answer some general questions about the Japanese music industry/bandomen in general.

Want to email something long?
tanukimistress [@] gmail.com

(I'm always happy for personal anecdotes about bandomen or any other gossip you come across, on tanuki or otherwise. Feel free to send me an email or submit to the blog.)

Please use the search function below before asking me any questions about specific band translations. You can search by band name or member name. Please also check the tag page and the "useful tags" list below.

If you have any questions, make sure you read the FAQ before you send them to me. Your question may have already been answered. A thousand times.
FAQ
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Asker Anonymous Asks:
What is your opinion on gossip/fan forums such as tanuki?
fuckyeahtanuki fuckyeahtanuki Said:

jimi-electrick:

I’m aware of them though I really don’t know much. I do know that describing tanuki as solely a ‘gossip/fan forum’ is both very generous and quite the understatement! Haha. Obviously l think it’s good that people can have a place to discuss and meet other people with similar interests to them. I am not really aware of the current state of gossip/fan forums, though I do know that there are more news aggregation type sites, which is good for those who don’t speak Japanese and/or aren’t in Japan. 

Gossip is always scary though. I never did anything that would merit any gossip and never wanted to so I guess I just never really worry about that aspect? I do hear things about invasion of privacy or sharing of information that shouldn’t be shared or ‘fans’ being unimaginably mean to one another, and then also about bad behavior of band dudes, so I dunno, maybe the dregs of both sides are meant for each other! 

That said, the times I have, in my weakness, looked up myself or whatever, it’s been interesting. Mostly affirming. Most people are nice, very kind, about me specifically. Some liked Chemical, some didn’t, and I was okay with that. My work with Tommy is not always regarded so highly, particularly by the Japanese fans, though I must say there are of course several very sweet people who have reached out to me because of the work I’ve done with her. In everything else I’m too far in the back to make a blip on anyone’s radar! :-P 

I have known bandudes that check threads about their bands on 2ch to keep track of what people are liking/don’t like and try to adjust their output, performances, or behavior accordingly, which I thought was pretty savvy. I don’t think I would have the fortitude for it.

If you have any other specific questions about this let me know; I don’t know if I was able to say anything of use! 

Sometimes I have come across information that is hilariously wrong and that’s funny

Sometimes I have come across information that is like, “how could you even possibly know that” and it’s eerie because it’s correct

i was a very, very good boy during my time in the band and pretty much always so im fairly positive like 99.999% there is no gossip about me but if anyone wanted to start a rumor that i am constantly surrounded by very cute and very famous babes i would neither confirm nor deny them????

Asker Anonymous Asks:
The complaining about the Kyo pictures reminds me of something which happened some time ago. Some Japanese girls shared FC pictures of a band in the Internet, some foreign fan found them and posted them on other websites... And well you can imagine what drama it was in the end xD
fuckyeahtanuki fuckyeahtanuki Said:

Japanese people can’t internet.

Asker Anonymous Asks:
Are bands like Dir en Grey or Gazette really that famos in Japan? I mean, do they have real sucsess or are they popular? I am German, and to be honest most of the People here really don't give a fuck about them. When they are touring here it is mostly in very small locations.
fuckyeahtanuki fuckyeahtanuki Said:

I feel like I’ll be answering this question eternally. I’m Sisyphus stuck in Tartarus here, answering the same question over and over with no visible impact. -sighs-

Okay, let me start with this. With the exception of bands/artists who gain serious international acclaim and artists who specifically market themselves overseas and not in their home country, it’s pretty normal for bands to be most popular in their country of origin. So Japanese bands playing smaller venues in your country than in Japan and the general public in your country being unaware of an artist from halfway around the world shouldn’t be something that surprises you. This should pretty much be obvious (or at least I should think so?). Popularity of a Japanese artist in Germany has absolutely zero correlation to popularity of a Japanese artist in Japan. Why would it?

So let’s get in to tackling this question of popularity. 

Visual-kei, in general, isn’t that popular. Generally speaking, even most of the “popular” visual-kei bands aren’t widely known except for in the little niche of visual-kei fans. Which means that, even in Japan, if you stop a bunch of young people on the street and ask them if they’ve heard of Dir en grey or Gazette, they’ll more than likely look at you like you’re crazy. Whereas you’d get an entirely different response if you asked about, say, pop artists/idols.

That said, Dir en grey and Gazette are pretty much as popular as a “modern” visual-kei band can get. Which means that they can play onemans at fairly sizable venues, but that doesn’t necessarily translate to wide acclaim amongst the Japanese public as a whole. So yeah, they’re really popular in the world of visual-kei, but visual-kei in general isn’t that popular, even if it has seen a bit of a resurgence in recent years. Basically, they’re big fish in a little pond.

Japanese visual-kei fans tend to judge a band’s popularity by the size of the venue they can play a oneman at. An example list is here. It doesn’t list any specific venues larger than Nippon Budokan, but please take this into consideration for reference. In March of this year, L’Arc~en~Ciel created the record for highest attendance at Japan’s National Olympic Stadium (soon to be demolished) by performing to a sold-out crowd of 80,000 people two days in a row. Compared to that, pretty much any other visual-kei band is basically completely insignificant.

Asker Anonymous Asks:
Kyo is the hugest troll going out with the same hat than in his gf pictures for the first Dir concert of this tour.
fuckyeahtanuki fuckyeahtanuki Said:

Kyo’s a troll, and he also doesn’t give a shit about people photographing him holding hands with a random girl (who may or may not be his girlfriend). He probably could give a fuck less about any fans who would be offended by the fact that he holds hands with girls, just as I was saying from the beginning.

Does this surprise anyone?

Asker Anonymous Asks:
I just wanted to say that I feel like tora is the victim in the whole nudes thing. I feel that taking someones picture while their sleeping or at all ,while their nude and then posting it to the internet is a violation. Tora did nothing wrong (unless your the type of person who thinks a grown man shouldn't be allowed to have sex). So what I'm trying to say here is that people shouldn't act as if tora is some kind of corrupted person just because of some nude pictures of him.
fuckyeahtanuki fuckyeahtanuki Said:

I personally have no problem with people having sex with multiple partners, so you’re preaching to the choir here. And I don’t think your character-limited ask is really going to go very far in convincing the slut-shamers to come around to your way of thinking.

Asker Anonymous Asks:
Not bandmen/tanuki related but do you know what ウタ means? I know basic Japanese but I have no idea what that means and some one asked me if I am ウタ, any help?
fuckyeahtanuki fuckyeahtanuki Said:

Why do people think I’m your help line for like everything related to Japanese/Japan? Seriously. Ask a Japanese person.

Are you sure that you didn’t hear/read wrong? Because as far as I know, the only Japanese word pronounced “uta” is (歌/唄/詩) which means song/poem. Google also tells me it is the name of a character from Tokyo Ghoul. There are no other meanings of “uta” that I have ever heard of.

Please don’t come to me with questions like this in the future.

Asker Anonymous Asks:
Could you imagine the amount of child support Acchan would have to pay if every son or daughter were to be identified.
fuckyeahtanuki fuckyeahtanuki Said:

Here’s to hoping he never has to find out, because no way in hell does B-T make enough money to support that. (^.~)

Asker Anonymous Asks:
Seems like all of Ruki's sex rumors are kinda old, i mean, i haven't seen anything about him on the recent years. Maybe he's a bit less outgoing? Or the fangirls forgot about it with new bandoman in scene?
fuckyeahtanuki fuckyeahtanuki Said:

OKAY YOU GUYS, SERIOUSLY. THIS IS LIKE THE TENTH TIME SOMEONE HAS SENT ME AN ASK LIKE THIS. AND I’VE ANSWERED IT. REPEATEDLY.

I frequently copy-paste from tanuki and translate in the window before posting, which means that I keep original tanuki date formatting.

TANUKI DATE FORMATTING IS YEAR/MONTH/DAY. THIS IS THE ACCEPTED DATE FORMATTING IN JAPAN.

WHICH MEANS ALL THE ONES THAT ARE LISTED 14/xx/xx ARE FROM 2014. Which means that this, this and this are all from THIS YEAR (the posts - they make no mention of the timing of the actual experience). Along with several from 2013, if you actually look through the goddamn tag.

Now maybe you don’t know about Japanese date formatting, but for gods sake, USE SOME COMMON FUCKING SENSE, as MONTH/DAY/YEAR (US) or DAY/MONTH/YEAR (most of the rest of the world) formatting would make the last two from 2019 and 2017, which clearly have not happened yet. (Also with MDY formatting, they’d be in the 14th month of the year).

If you’re complaining about there not being recent sex thread posts on here about Ruki, THERE AREN’T RECENT SEX THREAD POSTS ABOUT ANYONE, BECAUSE I HAVEN’T TRANSLATED ANY RECENTLY.

/rage

Asker Anonymous Asks:
@wataru (liphlich) anon: It probably has something to do with their band concept. As far as I remember the members once mentioned that they want their music to be 'sexy'... Correct me if I'm wrong, but if I got that right, him being almost naked in most pictures makes sense to me. He hasn't always been like that though. That change of image happened a while after they joined their label, so getting even more attention is another reason too I suppose. Sex sells after all.
fuckyeahtanuki fuckyeahtanuki Said:
Asker Anonymous Asks:
You guys realize you could just wait and see how the other foreigners act during the live. If they don't act like a dick? After or between bands go say hi and make friends who cares if they read the same blog as you.
fuckyeahtanuki fuckyeahtanuki Said:

fuckyeahbangya:

I think they want gossip buddies.

I think they’re looking for not-deluded people, not necessarily polite people.